The Knots Prayer

I got this in an e-mail the other day....the timing could not be more perfect. May it grab your heart, your soul, and your mind as it did mine...

The Knots Prayer

Dear God,

please untie the knots

that are in my mind,

my heart

and my life.

Remove the have nots,

the can nots

and the do nots

that I have in my mind.

Erase the will nots,

may nots,

and might nots

that find a home in my heart.

Release me from the could nots,

would nots

and should nots

that obstruct my life.

And most of all, dear God,

I ask that you remove from my mind

my heart

and my life

all of the am nots

that I have allowed to hold me back,

especially the thought

that I am not good enough.

Amen.

~Anonymous

Believing Him~Pamela

What would others say?

From a reading in one of my quiet times ...

"If someone unfamiliar with God were to describe-from observation alone-your relationship with God, what words might he or she select?" (Intimate Conservations: Devotions to nurture a woman's soul" by Alicia Britt Chole).

Whoa...think about it. What do others see when you are walking down the market isles, driving into work on those busy highways, or sitting in that pew at your place of worship? What does your family observe at home?
Would they say God is your Master? Father? Business Partner? Coach? Santa Clause? Other?

The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe. ~Proverbs 18:10

You may have all types of christian objects surrounding you (crosses on the wall, scripture verse plaques, fish decals on a car, even Bibles lying out on a table) but do others see the difference in your life that Christ has made?

I have been looking more closely at my life as a wife, a mother, a servant of God and I do not like what I am seeing. The longer I look the more SELFISHNESS I see. I am afraid I have been an ordinary wife, an ordinary mother and an ordinary servant of God. It is easy to be ordinary...Encarta.com defines ordinary as being

"common: of a common everyday kind; unremarkable: not remarkable or special in any way, and therefore uninteresting and unimpressive; usual or customary".

Yelp...that's me...just getting by as a mother and wife. My energy is sucked out of me at the end of my work day and I am literally on empty and not able to meet their needs. My tolerance is worn thin with such little things it seems. I feel so selfish when I think back to a nothing kind of evening and what I should have been doing with the ones I love the most.

Spiritually I feel unremarkable. Daily I spend time with God in the early morning hours and I call on Him throughout my day...but nothing above and beyond is happening. I mean seriously, all these long drives to meet my parents at their home to go to the Dr's office with them and not a word from God in those times of silence. He has had the perfect opportunity to speak to me-literally-but all I seem to get these days is silence. I feel selfish when my mind can not focus on Him but instead jumps to everything else surrounding my life. I miss ministry, I miss belonging to a church family, I miss being involved.

So whats a selfish mid-life women to do? I guess I need to turn this ordinary around and become extraordinary by God's grace by a purifying of my heart and mind. I have to believe it can happen! My husband says I'm my worst critic but selfishness is a pretty ugly thing and not a characteristic found in the extraordinary woman. I pray that as I enter into this new day, into this new week, that I know in myself I will only be ordinary, and in Christ I can become extraordinary!! To be extraordinary Encarta defines us as:

"unusually excellent and deserving attention and comment because of being wonderful, strange, or shocking; additional and having a special purpose; employed for a special purpose or to do additional work; additional to and going beyond the ordinary or established scope of something."

I want to be all these things..wonderful, excellent, having a special purpose, greater, going beyond, even shocking...for God and for my family. I want others to see Christ in me, to see Him for all the things He has become...but primarily to see Him as my Master.

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. ~Rom 12:1-2 (The Message)

What would others say about you and your relationship with God?????

His Maidservant~Pamela

Salt of the Earth....

Matthew 5:13-16 (NKLJV)
Believers Are Salt and Light

“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men. “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. 16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.

Four times this past week this passage has come to my attention...in my daily devotion time...in a sermon...on-line...even on facebook!! As my husband and I have have struggled through a difficult period in our ministry life and service to God, we have have been inquiring of God what we did wrong, where we made a wrong decision, vs if others were wrong. I have asked Him to be bold with His answer. I guess you can not get any bolder than having the same scripture coming to you that many times.

We are trying to embrace this period of respite but it is hard. We are doers-servers and teachers according to our spiritual gifts. I asked my husband as we read these verses in a Bible study we are doing together last night if maybe we had lost our saltiness. Have we become like the Israelites in the old testament wondering in a desert because we have not followed God fully. He agreed and stated "I feel so worthless..." and so do I.

Though our ministries appeared to be growing and seemed to be very active...had we allowed "something" into our lives to take away the salty savor that God needed in us so we could be affective for Him and not just for the ministries? This is so difficult to face even as I write these words...

Direct my footsteps according to your word; let no sin rule over me. ~ Psalm 119:133

Is it possible to loose ones saltiness while being so active in ministry? I'm afraid we have had to face that reality and humbly acknowledge the tolerance of things in this world we have allowed into our personal lives. This tolerance, big or small as it might appear from outsiders, now requires this time of respite... to re-group, to recommit and to more importantly remove any hindrance that have dulled our ability to serve God. Like the Israelites in Deuteronomy 30,we have allowed other "things" to really take priority of our lives and it seems it has become a road block for God's purposes.

Have you ever been in my shoes? Can you related? We are on a pilgrimage and we are holding on to the promises God gave to the Israelites in Deut. 30:2-3....

"...and when you and your children return to the LORD your God and obey him with all your heart and with all your soul according to everything I command you today, then the LORD your God will restore your fortunes and have compassion on you.."

Our fortune was serving in ministry and we miss it terribly. We know that when we return to Him with a full heart and soul commitment He promises restoration and compassion. We became to busy to see our feet slipping and now these two things are what we need the most right now.

One of the worst things we could have done is to not give God our all. We have never been more grieved over this along with our past failures and sins than we are today and we have never been more committed to get it right so that we can once again be salt and light in this world for His eternal proposes...not ours, not the ministries...HIS.

Holy God, restoring and compassionate Father, full of mercy and grace, embrace your servants. Allow us to rest on your shoulders during this time of respite. Allow us to grieve our mistakes and to grow from them becoming more capable of being a vessel you can use. We want to be a a man and a women after your own heart but we are weak, we lose focus, even when we think we are spiritually strong. we are nothing without You, we are everything in You. Help me to be the supportive mate my husband needs right now, to complement and build him up as he too is beat down by this. I have seen you use him and work through him and it humbled me. Do it again Lord. Do it again...for Your eternal purposes and Your glory alone.~Amen

Nevertheless....

I love finding nuggets of blessings in a freshly read verse in the bible....you know, a little nugget of truth from God's Word that tugs at your heart at that right moment. Or a scriptural nugget of promise when your are feeling low and in need of hope for your situation. Or how about that nugget of instruction tucked away in a very familiar Bible passage seen with a new insight. For me, it's better than a warm cup of coffee first thing in the morning or a Dove chocolate in mid-afternoon to boost me through the day!

Yesterday, I found this sweet scriptural nugget for my soul as I was flying back home on Midwest Airlines. It is from a very familiar story...one told many times in my Sunday school years and in the pulpit of the preachers I have been blessed to be under. Take a few moments to read it and live in its moment. Then dwell for a minute on the bolded word that captured my attention and let it capture yours...

Luke 5 (NKJV)
1And it came to pass, that, as the people pressed upon him to hear the word of God, he stood by the lake of Gennesaret,
2And saw two ships standing by the lake: but the fishermen were gone out of them, and were washing their nets.
3And he entered into one of the ships, which was Simon's, and prayed him that he would thrust out a little from the land. And he sat down, and taught the people out of the ship.
4Now when he had left speaking, he said unto Simon, Launch out into the deep, and let down your nets for a draught.
5And Simon answering said unto him, Master, we have toiled all the night, and have taken nothing: nevertheless at thy word I will let down the net.
6And when they had this done, they inclosed a great multitude of fishes: and their net brake.
7And they beckoned unto their partners, which were in the other ship, that they should come and help them. And they came, and filled both the ships, so that they began to sink.
8When Simon Peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus' knees, saying, Depart from me; for I am a sinful man, O Lord.
9For he was astonished, and all that were with him, at the draught of the fishes which they had taken:
10And so was also James, and John, the sons of Zebedee, which were partners with Simon. And Jesus said unto Simon, Fear not; from henceforth thou shalt catch men.
11And when they had brought their ships to land, they forsook all, and followed him.

Nevertheless...have you noticed that word there before? Every other translation reads with "but" or "because" which does not depict the value of the action here. It really is a powerful statement....nevertheless...Jesus spoke and a heart and a will responded. Nevertheless...God is revealed and a life is changed for the eternal. Nevertheless represents faith...it represents obedience...it is an obedient faith.

No matter how many different directions I am being pulled in, no matter how many failures I fall to, no matter how many rejections I face....nevertheless, at Thy word I believe...I walk forward in faith because God is good and so very faithful!! Obedient faith is a choice. Can you say nevertheless today?

Believing Him~Pamela

Please be sure to pray for Elaine at Peace for the Journey as she begins her battle with breast cancer. Thank you!

Scriptural Weapons

Do you feel like you play mind games with your past? You know, those haunting memories of past mistakes that satan likes to throw at us when we are at our best, or, at our worst for that matter. Thrown at us to knock us off course from the truth of God's forgiveness and grace. Know what I am talking about? Surely I am not alone in this. The mind is a powerful thing to behold and many a battles can occur there. These battles have the power to destroy a person mentally, physically, and spiritually. Satan knows if he can play with our thoughts and actually affect our well-being, he wins against our creators control and ownership of us.

There are so many great Bible studies out now dealing with this very subject and I think it would benefit us significantly to explore these studies. Even without these studies though we have a weapon readily available for us. Daily I fight him in this area but I have the one weapon he cannot win against and that's the Word of God!!

Now may the God of peace make you holy in every way, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless until our Lord Jesus Christ comes again. ~ 1 Thess 5:23 (NLT)

God knew this battle would not be easy for us. He knew that with each insult, each attack that if we would handle it with His Word we would gain so much more...such as holiness...scantification...victory. This is His aim for us.

But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ. So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless. ~ 1 Cor. 15:57-58 (NLT)

Be strong and immovable...even in our thought life. One guaranteed way to do this is through scripture. I love praying back scripture. I started doing this years ago after reading and studying through Beth Moore's book "Praying God's Word". It has been the best salve, the best medicine for my body, my mind and my soul. So this morning as I was contemplating this subject on my ride in to work, I knew I needed a piece of scripture to put to memory to fight against satan every time he planted a thought into my mind referencing my past failures that had the potential to destroy my well-being. He, God, gave it to me and I give it to you challenging you to also put it to your memory and throw it at satan every time he attacks your mind:

You have forgiven the iniquity of Your people; You have covered all their sin. Selah ~ Psalm 85:2

Just what I need every time my past failures are brought before me...a reminder that I am forgiven! Believing this, I can throw back this verse to him verbally as his fiery insults and untruths attempt to penetrate my well-being. Even more what I appreciate about this verse is how it ends. Selah. Peace. Yes, peace...what we obtain when we use this verse as a weapon. Try it!

If you have a favorite verse you like to use as a weapon against satans attacks, please share it here. We can never have too many scriptural weapons these days.

Believing Him~ Pamela

Messages in the Clouds...

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. ~ Ecclesiastes 3:11

Here recently I am having the privilege of traveling quite a bit with my job. It is just for a season, for "training" but I am loving it to be honest. I love most of all boarding those planes and taking in those views when we are high in the sky. This past week I took off late in the evening heading for Houston. The flight had been delayed an hour due to storms between my home and Texas. I had settled in with a new book but still the wait was a bit irrigating. However, when we got up into the sky I turned my eyes away from my book and looked out and was literally taken back in amazement by our Creator. I put my sun glasses on partially because of the suns rays but also because of the tears welling up.



I have always loved the clouds in the sky. I would love to lay on the soft grass of spring or summer as a child and watch the clouds floating by. If you looked hard enough and long enough, you would feel like you were floating. Remember? OR how many times did you look for shapes within the clouds? Sweet memories.



On this trip I saw the biggest, fluffiest, whitest clouds and literally just a planes wing depth away. The wing of the plane would tickle their edges and yet they did not move, did not change shape, but just floated there where God had planted it....or should I say painted it.



There was a horizon of sort...I am not sure if it was made from the heat or moisture but it looked like a landscape of sorts and the clouds looked like it's mountains. It made me think of heaven. It seemed so pure...so beautiful. A little piece of heaven brought down for my eyes to behold? Maybe, maybe not but I do know it took my breath away and left my heart beating faster like a child excited for that new gift. That vision was a gift from above and I embraced it.



Not one of those big beautiful clouds were alike. All of them different, just like us. I realized that we see only part of the clouds from the ground. God truely has the better view looking down on them. When you are above them, or beside them, you realize the magnitude of how they seem to blossom into a masterpeice. I left my book closed on my lap for a long time and just praised Him...Oh how I needed that vision of Him through those clouds in that horizon high above the earth.



When I was flying home a few nights later, the sun had set and we were experiencing some turbulence. Again, out my window was God at work in the clouds...this time in a darken gray cloud displaying it's own fireworks as lights danced back and forth throughout it's mass. It was an incredible light show. I could not tell if lightening was actually shooting to the ground or if all the activity was strictly within the cloud itself. It was awesome all the same. It took my breath away...again.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. ~ Ecclesiastes 3:11

Did you take time to see the beauty of God in His creation today? By doing this were you also drawn to the eternal? When I was young, I was amazed at how the human body worked...so I became a nurse to know it better. I am even more amazed with this creation on earth that we call our temporary home...and so I seek to know God better so I can spend eternity with Him. Can you even imagine that if it can be this beautiful here now, how much more beautiful will it be in heaven? Big sigh.

My awesome God and Creator, You WOW me beyond words, beyond expression, beyond feeling. You are more than I can wrap my mind around on most days but I ask You for more..more of You..of Your works...of Your presence. I praise you for all that You have created, for all that You have done, and for all that You are yet to do. You know I am flying out again next week...can we meet again in the sky? Will You be so kind as to WOW me again with your masterpiece in the heavens? Thank you Lord...thank you for showing me your greatness once again. I can't help but sing your praises!!

Sing to God, sing praise to His name, extol Him who rides on the clouds — His name is the LORD— and rejoice before Him. ~ Psalm 68:4

Believing Him...Experiencing Him~Pamela

Perfect That Which Concerns Me Lord...

My Holy God, my Jehovah Rapha,

Life can sure throw some wild pitches. Sometimes it literally feels like a painful punch! I'll be honest in that I can't always tell if it is from You or from satan. Yet in all the chaos and busyness of my days, even with my failures, You give me a treasure and assure me of not only Your presence but Your love and mercy. You awe me Lord. Sometimes these treasures are found in something beautiful You created placed in my path, or it has been in the thoughtful words or act of kindness from another...but most times I find it in Your Words.

I love Your treasures.

I cherish these treasure.

You always know what I need and miraculously place it within my reading just at the right moment. Something written so many years ago written just for me. It amazes me Lord. This weekend You gave me this....

The LORD will perfect that which concerns me;

Your mercy, O LORD, endures forever;

Do not forsake the works of Your hands.

~Psalm 138:8

What concerns me today? A rebellious child? An illness? Unanswered questions? Depression? A stronghold that I am in battle with? An unsaved family member or friend or neighbor? A broken heart? A lonely heart? Maybe I feel defeated, unappreciated, or unwanted?Maybe it's this new job, a new ministry, or for that fact, a lost job or a lost ministry. You know. You have searched my heart, You know my anxious thoughts (Ps 139: 23-24) and so You gave me this...

The LORD will perfect that which concerns me

I may not understand why I am going these thing that concern me but You do. You have a plan. A perfect plan. What a comfort this bring me today. Thank you Lord. I am excited at what the outcome will be. I pray I do not get in the way of Your perfecting process.

And then I am humbled, Father, with this thought of Your perfecting process in me. Like Paul, I can say "I m the worst of sinners" and I do not deserve this. I desire it but I am not worthy. But that is not how You want me to focus my mind is it? Your still small voice whispered in my inner being today "I choose you for this because I love you and I have plans for you in this....plans that will glorify me through you" and with that I can pray...

Your mercy, O LORD, endures forever;

You are so good God. Your mercy and love is more than I can wrap my mind around on most days. I don't deserve this but I embrace it and I praise You. I praise you for Your greatness, for all that I have, and all that I have been through, and I ask Lord...

Do not forsake the works of Your hands.

Remember me and how far we have come together. Place your covering of protection on those things we have built together Lord. Continue to lead me on this new journey before me. There will be days that you will have to carry me. I can be weak like that...

yet...I feel so strong in You on those day I allow you to carry me.

Grow my trust.

Grow my faith.

We have done some good things together and it is sometimes hard to let go of what one grows but I trust that You need me to work for you in another way. Let it be to me as you have said, I am your servant (Luke 1:38). Perfect that which concerns me Lord. And while your at it, point out anything in me that offends you. I want you to delight in me. Make me holy.

Believing You~Pamela